Monday, March 22, 2010

And It Will All Be New.

Sometimes life is about facing one's fears. And fears are weird; they don't necessarily make sense to other people.

I've come to realize my biggest fear is making the wrong decision. Specifically about work. As adaptable as I am, I have this trepidation about working in a new environment. I don't like change. I have to do it, and it takes some courage, but I don't like it. I want to find work in a family atmosphere. I want to work with people who have the goal I have. I want to do good work, and I can't do it alone. That's theatre.

When I have to leave town, I get physically sick. (My husband will attest that I feel nauseous.) I hate traveling away from my base. I do it all the time, I have to, but I don't like it. I love the work. I hate the move.

Yeah, get over it! So, now, I don't feel nauseous, but trepidatious. Those feelings will all disappear the moment I start the job. We all lose anxiety when we actually have something to do. I need something to do. I can't be in my "comfort zone" so fuck it. Off I go.

There is something to be said about working within my neighborhood. I'm so grateful I can live at home. It is a gift that changes all.

I used to work through every Christmas. Lately I've worked through every summer and had Christmas. I will enjoy living at home in the summer. (Maybe I can avoid Christmas! Lol, just kidding..)

I've warned you my blogs are meandering. So, there you are and There I Am.

1 comment:

  1. I have to say that I am not thrilled with being away from home in the spring and early summer again. As I watch green shoots and buds start to appear in my yard and garden I get sad. And this summer is really an unknown, isn't it?

    That being said, I am very happy you can be at home with your husband as you start this new adventure!

    xo
    Claudia

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