Wednesday, September 20, 2017

First Rehearsal...



I had a great first rehearsal today! Sometimes one is able to do a 90 minute production meeting before rehearsal.. a meet and greet and designer presentation next.. a break. so freakin' needed... an Equity meeting and then a read-through. Costume fittings, wig fittings, interviews with the entire cast for the website and then convince the director we should end early because.. oh my goodness! What a day! I was able to update my cast/scene breakdown and the conflict rehearsal schedule. My director and I are on one page. LOVING IT! Off we go into a very complicated hour and 5 min. show. Loving the complications. Love that it is Roald Dahl's THE WITCHES and will play up to Halloween. Love stage managing. It is the art.

Tuesday, September 19, 2017

My Mentor and What He Did on 9/11

Quote from Judi Davidson: 
True true true: Miss The Red Shoes at the Ahmanson and live to regret it! Gordon was the first to bring Matthew Bourne's company to America ("Swan Lake") and continued to premier
all his productions in the US.


Me: REALLY? Wow! I didn't know. I was so just family there. I thought every thing we did was new and perfect. It really was. Man. Judi, I was so lucky to have you and Gordon in my life. Gordon was truly my mentor and made me the stage manager I am today. I had another First Rehearsal today and Gordon was in my thoughts as I brought the room together for the meet and greet. It was the same. I actually mentioned how Gordon taught me how to throw focus to the ARTISTIC DIRECTOR. Yay! The thing about Matthew Bourne.. 9/11 was one day before the opening of CAR MAN at the Ahmanson. I had tickets and had arranged for my ASM to call my show next door at the Taper so I could bring Phil and see the show! GD of course had to cancel the 9/11 shows and delayed Car Man's opening.. but on 9/12 he had them perform to the invited audience and I believe any one else who wanted to come. We went. Gordon gave the most beautiful speech about our national sorrow without taking focus from the artists about to perform. It was a wondrous night for me and for Phil whose birthday it was. We cried and loved our community. The show was magical and healing and your husband helped us move forward. I was in NYC with him for QED just a few days after that. Sorry this is so long. I am still on steriods for my cancer and I get a bit wordy and weepy. Love you so much and please know that I share your grief. I also share your love for a man I was privileged to know, to love and to be loved by.

Thursday, September 7, 2017

My Most Perfect Nephew

My Dear Friend,

I read your beautifully written essay on Facebook about being overwhelmed and stressed by all the responsibilities you currently face and I am sorry, but glad to hear you got up and got out of yourself. Leaving the house is always a good thing my love.

I started to respond on Facebook after I finished reading your piece and this is what I wrote:
"I find I am crying a lot these last few days. I am sad and scared. I am more frightened now than I have ever been in my life. Alas. 
My heart is full of hope but oh so full of fear."

I realized I couldn't leave that statement public. I deleted it. I don't want to get into a conversation with folk about.. hmm, whatever they would imagine scares me so much.
I thought folk would think it was about my cancer. (It is not. I am not at all concerned about my health. I go about my day and try to get work done or not. It is what it is.) It is not about Phil's multiple sclerosis. Yes, he is geting worse, but we have expected this for years and like me, he gets up and gets work done or not and then we have a drink. Can't worry or stress about these things. We can only do what the docs tell us. We are alive and we are together and folk still seem to hire me from time to time. Lol.
Okay. Non- issue.

I will tell you why I am so afraid. I need to tell someone - I choose you, sweet heart.

My beautiful 27 year old nephew, Taylor Harley Klinger, is a Federal Policeman. (No, not a Federal Marshall. - I know, I never heard of it either until he became one.) He has had a lot of success and has become so much his own man. I am very proud of him. He is a poet and a song-writer. He quotes philosophers on facebook. I love him more than my life.

He has volunteered for a six month tour in Afghanistan. He leaves Tuesday.
Every time I think of this I start to shake and tears come into my eyes. I am so afraid for him. I spoke to him for a while yesterday and was cheerful and acted like the good crazy aunt. I told him not to get himself killed, to come back to us. He said he would be back before we knew it and he could email and Facebook, though he won't have his phone.  He will be in Kabul. His job is to escort the generals and officials and other civilians to meetings and events in Kabul. He is basically a driver and a guard. He will stay in a dorm. Sounds innocent enough but you and I know better. 

What a world. I made notes when I called him so I wouldn't cry. I told him this. I had my list of things I needed to say to him. Oh, god. 

That's it. 

Love you my dear.



Mary K Klinger
Production Stage Manager


Wednesday, September 6, 2017

Dearest Sister!

How wonderful to talk to you today. Your grief is profound and frankly life changing. I think all of us with husbands of so many years can at least begin to anticipate the pain you are having. .. (look at many of us.. so many of us have married and have been together since our twenties. Marilyn and Tim... You and MIke. Me and Phil.. Michelle  and whatever his name is.. Ha. .. Sue  and whatever his name is.. after her first husband... okay..my theory is starting to fall apart.. WAIT! Celia and Billy. Yes.. They have been married since they were 18 yrs. old! Fuck all. My point is.. I think many of us married young and found FAMILY. We were a group of profoundly good and honest women loving not only each other but the world around us. We were/are kind. And generous.. And chose good folk to marry. How did we know and why are we all finding each other again. Gosh... I can't believe I am saying this, but was it LOUISVILLE? So many of us ran away from that tiny school. I went to UCLA partly because it was So BIG! I ran away from all the teenage things.. and yet.. NOW I realize, we were in fact more family and more like sisters than anywhere else. How wondrous to return to y'all. How amazing to know that I've been missing you and didn't even know it. You, all of you, know me better than anyone I've met after. Ladies. I love you. 

K. THIS IS FROM MEMORY..

At Dawning of Life We Stand
We are guided by your helping hand.
We have opened our hearts to the wisdom of his will
Lead us to his strength oh Lousiville.
My alma mater we bring to thee
Our love our hope our family
OH LOUISVILLE. Our LOUISVILLE.
Dieu La Vie oh LOUIS VILLE (sung with gusto.) 

The March We All did and what it said about us.

My friends.

What a world, what a world.. as she melts into the puddle on the ramparts of her castle.

I went to pour a glass of vodka,

I dropped the glass. My favorite glass. It broke on the floor and my husband came running out. Oh! so much blood. I was barefoot and we spent the next 30 minutes wrapping my amazing bleeding foot. He is still cleaning up the glass.

Not how I wanted to introduce my latest blog, but this is life and this is what happens. And now I just knocked over the cranberry juice on the carpet.. My hands have no control. My husband is beyond.. not pleased. Shoot. I want him to go to bed but he still keeps cleaning and it makes me a bit nervous.

I want to talk about the things going on not only in my head but in the wider world. The marches! The marches that had to turn into rallies. The unity and love and community I felt last Saturday. The anger I felt a couple of days later when the "other side" insisted on not understanding what we were doing.

The community I felt staying in just one place. And yet.. in a wheelchair. Honestly. Being completely ignored. Weird.

In a world of community, my friends, my husband.. ONE woman greeted me as her sister. I was ignored in the wheelchair. I didn't quite get it until we were in the parking lot and as were we leaving we met a wonderful group of 5 women leaving as we were. We applauded each other and they insisted on taking selfies with us. They were from Compton... Phil is Arabic.. I was in a wheelchair.. it was beautiful!

And yet..
We need to make a better job of helping each other. As my husband was trying to push me thru the crowd a young woman was holding up a sign with a handicapped emblem saying I am marching for those who can't. SHE DIDN'T SEE ME in a wheel chair and didn't move out of the way as we were trying so hard to get out of the oppressive crowd. SHE DIDN'T see me!  We maneuvered around the camera that was taking her picture.

HELLO.
This is not about YOU helping. This is about the folk that need the help. How nice you showed up. What did you do to help?

Sorry.. I am a bit astounded at how little help or attention Phil and I saw and received as we tried to participate and struggled with the wheelchair and the cane. We were invisible.

We are good. WE are strong. But.. a lot of people needed more help than we did. LADIES.
WHERE WERE YOU? You never even looked down at me in the wheelchair.

I had a pink hat. I was wearing the sweatshirt for the LA March. I met some of my friends It was a glorious day.

Yet. We need to get better at this and we need to support and look at each other. WE need to SEE each other. Hello! I am here. I will be here for you. Things will get tough. LOOK AT ME. Ladies!

And then.. Talk to me.. I am in a wheelchair. I would love for you to look down and say a word or two to me. I am getting up to just say "hi."

Don't be afraid to talk to me too. I have cancer. I can't breathe very well. I have trouble standing. I look like I am okay. I am not. My husband has MS. We brought the wheelchair to share our disabilities. We have invisible disabilities. We try so hard to look like the general population. WE are sick and yet we want to contribute. DO NOT IGNORE US!

WTF.
Very few people talked to us. I think handicapped people may be the last ignored folk.. come on!











Monday, September 4, 2017


Dear Friends.

We lost Gordon Davidson this week. Such a shock because as I told EVERYBODY.. we  talk about
him all the time. Still.

My heart is broken. yes. people die. Frank died. my mom died. I need all of them i need them. Stanley died. my Cousin apparently killed herself and i didn't know until years later my cat died and i knew it before anyone told me. And yet.. I have to wake up and appreciate how much.. how much...hm.

and
and
and..
Yeah. death. You know.